In my opinion I believe this to be the fundamental issue between men and women. Ya see a long time ago men were the workhorses of the family. This was also in the days when men were the only ones going to work. Most of the jobs (especially the middle class families) were factory jobs or some other field requiring strength or some other reason to not include a woman in that field.And then you all burned your bras. Since then women have come a very long way. Not only equal to but in many cases in modern day society, have surpasses men. This phenomenon can be contributed to many factors:
1. No more middle class--as a result of the destruction of the middle class there are less men out there in the workforce. Many men find themselves in the situation where they have to stop going to school to start working in order to feed their families.
2. More Women with that Paper--the fact of the matter is, there are more of ya'll getting Diplomas and better paying jobs than we are. It may be true that the highest earners of a company are men, but the percentages play out better in your favor.
These along with several other factors are the root of what I feel has become a major disconnect between men and women. In the days when man ruled the Earth, everybody understood their roles. Man went to work. Wife stayed home and held down the fort. It was like this practically forever. Fast forward to today, and everything is all jacked up..lol. Divorce rates at an all time high. People are communicating with each other less and less. Most importantly we forgot how to treat each other.
You all as a whole have this "new power." Being the primary bread winner in may relationships, this entitles to certain liberties. While that may seem as a given to the younger generation, ask your grandmother how many "liberties" she had in her relationship. The issue comes when a woman feels she can't punk/play/bitch her man around. That fat wallet of yours has given you quite the heavy hand that you just love to swing around. Most of the time it's directed towards the guy your seeing. Especially said guy is not bringing in the same amount of money as you.
You need to understand, no man wants to be with a woman who treats him like less of a man. I see it so many times. A chick is blasting on her man in public (A BIG NO NO), or the guy will have a leash on him so tight, he can't even jump of the porch. Like WTF happened.
Advice
Dr. Lipshitz says...Ladies, I think you guys need to start treating your man more like a man. The most recent example I used. Sorry for the graphic nature of this but once again being totally blunt is the best way to get my point across. Next time you want your man to do something, make a list of everything you want him to do. Once you have it all written up, just before you give it to him, give him a BJ. As outlandish as this seems you have accomplished more than you think. You just gave him the strength and energy to build a house by hand, you just told him, without words, how much you appreciate him. Most of all he feels like a man.
This also works in your favor. At least for myself having your woman make you feel like a man is one of the most understated qualities of a good woman. The one that makes me feel like Zeus typically is the one getting most of my attention. If you can put your pride in your pocket for the sake of your man and your relationship you will be surprised the results you can get from a guy.
I get it, you have worked extremely hard to get where you are. Why should you have to coddle some guys fragile male ego. Cause that's the way it was for years, and if it ain't broke don't fix it.
Seems like good jumping off point for discussion. I will now leave it to you. What do you think would be the solution to this problem.
Well....I may agree with some of your points, but that still does not excuse men for some of their behaviors; if men could just go to work and work hard to support their families, that would be great... But, instead they go to work to make that dough, hit the club a few times to spend that cash that they worked so hard for; meet as many women as they can (hopefully they do not have a significant other that they are commited or slightly commited to)...and when they come home, they have a few new numbers in their phone and maybe a number or two scribbled on a paper in their pocket. When we, women, try to do the "womanly" thing around the house; pick up your crap that is laying around from last night, cause you went out and are sleeping in today... we round up the clothes for laundry day, check pockets so we don't wash your cash or god forbid your cellphone... and what do we find; a number. Do we take it? What are the chances that you were 'networking' for business purposes the night before? I'd say close to none since your ass came home in a taxi at about 4 am, you smell of liquor and NO business venture in their right mind would be discussing any business with you in this state - unless it was 'funny' business!!! And, would a business contact not have a business card with a business name that is somewhat associated with what you do?
ReplyDeleteWomen have come a long way in society and the work force; but most of all in relationships. We no longer roll over and take the crap that you are serving. You want a bj? Sure, come home on a Friday night; I will give a bj and do your laundry and clean your house. However, if you are out at the club 'hanging' with the boys (code for meeting other women) - then have them give you the bj, clean your house and hold your hand when you have had a rough day! It is simple; do to me what you want me to do to you! That is my modern day philospohy...
You bring up some very good points as well. You are 100% correct when you express that men out there need to step their game up as well.
ReplyDeleteI argee with some points that you have stated! Divorce rates have sky rocketed in recent years, and maybe some women can take a lesson from the older generation on how to treat a man. Men need to be nutured and cared for. But there is an important point that most men are missing! If you give us an inch, we will take you a mile!
ReplyDeleteAll it takes to keep a man is to feed his ego, and make him feel more like a "MAN"! BUT and a BIG BUT is there are many men out there that want to be treated as a man and who have not yet earned that right! You have to act like a man, treat your women like a women, be faithful, and if you want someone to take care of you never forget to care for them!!!!